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Here’s the absolutely massive Tamagotchi Paradise next to other objects in the wild, for scale

No product launch excites me more than the release of a new Tamagotchi. So when it comes time to review one, I like to first give myself a little while to just live with the device — to feel that initial delight and let it die down before I try to look at it critically. That way, I can more fairly assess whether we’ve actually got a toy that’s worth the price tag and will hold a person’s attention once the novelty wears off.

But Tamagotchi Paradise arrived a few days ago, and while a proper review will be coming down the line, there’s one thing we need to address right off the bat: This thing’s fucking huge.

It is slightly larger overall than the previous reigning beast of the Tamagotchi family, the Tamagotchi Pix (but a hair thinner). Tamagotchi Paradise is so big, it makes me want to resurrect out-of-fashion internet terms to describe it: absolute unit; “oh lawd, he comin'”; etc., etc. Leading up to the device’s release, there were a lot of questions about how big it really is, so for anyone who hasn’t yet had a chance to get their hands on one, here you go, I’m going to do my best to illustrate it for you.

Here’s how Tamagotchi Paradise compares in size to:

Now, don’t get me wrong, Tamagotchi Paradise’s comically large build isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Actually, I’m kind of into it. It’s certainly harder to juggle this device with anything else I might be holding, like my phone or a drink, but it does have a nice heft to it and it feels pretty good in the hand. And thanks to its sheer bulkiness, I’m probably less likely to misplace it around the house, as I’ve been known to do with smaller models that easily slip between couch cushions.

Will I be running two of these at the same time? Probably not, beyond the brief moments when I want to use the Connection features. My bag only has so much room. But is Tamagotchi Paradise so cumbersome that I won’t be bringing one everywhere with me for the foreseeable future? I think we all know the answer to that.

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